Paul Paul's reading ability has shot through the roof! I no longer dread his quiet absence, because it often means he's off reading a book to himself, and not secretly getting into mischief. (Although that still happens on occasion.)
He also enjoys the outdoors and runs like a mini athlete. He absolutely loves playing catch, racing with, or tackling his daddy.
Gradually, we're seeing fewer and fewer screaming fits from Paul, which has been awesome! In fact, right around the time he turned four years old, Paul turned a corner in his emotional development. I think he's finally realized that putting THAT much effort into resisting mom and dad is just not worth it.
He's also overcoming his shy side and will go out to talk to other kids at the playground. He loves telling jokes and making people laugh. He's such a fun person to be around!
Here are a few of his recent sayings: 1. “I’m sick. I don’t have cancer, I’m just normal sick.”
2. While Blair was making mini "pizzas" on bread for them both, Paul says, “You know that flavor when you throw up in your nose?" Blair said that "yes" he did know that flavor, "why?". Matter-of-factly Paul answered, "That’s what the cheese smells like, but I still like to eat it.” When Blair was telling me this story he had me smell the Parmesan cheese, and I almost gagged! Paul was soooo right!
3. "What's this to learn about?" Paul asked as he took an Italian-English dictionary off the shelf. "That's to learn another language" I say. He responds, "I'm just looking at the words. Don't worry. I'm not going to learn another language."
4. While driving Paul observed, "Hey, the sky is following us!" After persistent questions from Paul, I eventually tried my best to explain why closer objects appear to pass faster and farther objects appear to pass slower. He listened intently then sat silent for a while staring out the window. Finally he exclaimed in a hushed tone, "That's hard to know."
Here's a video of a daily occurrence in our home. Paul's toilet reading material of choice is always his Piggie And Gerald books from the library. In the beginning you can only hear him reading, but then I was able to sneak my phone into the doorway without him noticing.
Darla
Darla just turned nine months a few days ago. (What on earth?!) She is really starting to burst with personality! She likes to show off her seven (almost eight) teeth in sniffs and giggles as she excitedly watches Paul dance around her and make up silly songs for her.
Darla is a champion eater, just like her brother, and she's quite demanding about her meals. She's normally a fairly quiet baby unless she's near food and their's not anything currently in her mouth. (This mama's secret eating is almost impossible these days with a baby who can smell a square of chocolate from across the room.)
She loves to wave hello and goodbye. She's also finally starting to make some progress in the movement department. If she's motivated enough, she'll army crawl her way to an object. But she still is much happier to sit on her bum and enjoy her entertaining brother.
Darla already loves to "share" too. She'll take a treasured toy or food item and hand it to you or try to shove it in your mouth. If you accept her offering, she'll burst into fits of snorting laughter!
Here's a video of her "Darla" babbles. It's a couple months old, but she still sounds a lot like this now.
My little ham Paul...
I almost explode with joy quite frequently with these little ones and with my amazingly awesome husband Blair! I don't know how I got so lucky!
This analogy came to me over the last few days, but it requires a little background explanation: While debating current issues with my cousin, he suddenly felt the need to attack my religion by saying that "Kate Kelly was excommunicated for asking a question" . This sounded silly to me and the answer so obvious. I responded that she did not just ask a question. I told him that I - and many of my church friends - ask the same kinds of questions Kate Kelly did and we're still enjoying full membership in the church. How could he not see the difference? I wondered. I came to the conclusion that the one experience which has expanded my understanding on issues like these more than any other is motherhood.
Becoming a parent has broadened my perspective in ways I never would have imagined. I never knew real frustration until I had children. I also never knew real love and real joy until I had children. In the process of attempting to teach these future adults something of value, I have learned more about myself - and humanity in general - than one would think possible while cleaning messes, hushing meaningless arguments, and kissing owies better. Outside my little home, I watch fellow members of the LDS Church become offended and choose to leave of their own accord, or they make choices which lead them to be excommunicated, or others who become so offended they wallow in anger and curse God and His commandments. I also see people joining the Church and hear them say with pure joy in their eyes that they’re finally “home”; watch their lives transform and their relationships heal. I can’t help but see so many parallels inside my home and out, that I felt compelled to write down the following analogy. Like all analogies, it isn't perfect. It's mostly for myself, but I felt it appropriate (and may be helpful) to share with others.
The Family Night Analogy
This life is like Monday night in a Mormon home. Imagine with me that mom and dad have great plans for family night with a lesson, activities, and a treat at the end for everyone who participates. Dad's conducting and has special assignments for everyone. Sometimes it doesn't go as smoothly as it could because some kids choose not to participate, others don’t even get the message that family night has started, and others choose to argue about who gets what assignment. For example, maybe mom and dad give little Jimmy the assignment to pass something out to all the family members. The children don't know why Jimmy was chosen for this, and Kate gets jealous, "why does only Jimmy get to do that? That's not fair!" Mom and dad may calmly explain that this was Jimmy’s assignment, and she’ll get to do something else. If Kate complies and sits back down she can stay, get a handout of her own, and enjoy the rest of family night. If she gets up, tries to grab the handouts from Jimmy and continues to be disruptive despite gentle warnings, then she will be asked to leave and take a time-out.
Could one of the other kids have done it? Sure, but maybe mom and dad have a good reason they assigned the task to Jimmy. Maybe Jimmy gets restless and disinterested if he isn't given an assignment right away, or maybe that's the only task he's capable of accomplishing well on his own. Whatever the reason, the parents most likely have other assignments planned for the other children and they know what's best for each of them. Mom and dad still love all the children the same and want all of them to learn, participate, and have a treat.
Sometimes kids will compare privileges and responsibilities among themselves and speculate why mom and dad did it that way. Often someone will feel convinced things are unjustly allotted because they can't understand the parents’ reasoning. Even if mom or dad tried to explain it to them, they would most likely fight back with invalid arguments, simply because they can’t comprehend the bigger picture. The children don't have the parental perspective.
It’s important to remember that this particular family night is only one tiny instance in their childhood, just as this life is only one minuscule speck of our eternal existence. We lived before we came to earth, and we'll live infinitely longer after. Sure a lot of things can seem unfair in that single moment, but only the parents have a broader picture of each child’s identity, needs, and potential. Perhaps one child is especially gifted at something that would be needed for that night's lesson. Maybe another child has ADHD and needs things taught a little differently. Maybe two particular children need to be separated through the duration of the lesson to maintain peace. The list of potential scenarios could go on. Knowing these children before and after this family night event would provide better context as to why the mother and father do what they do.
I see Kate Kelly as the girl who was jealous of Jimmy's assignment. Our Heavenly Parents have assigned the men to administer the priesthood ordinances in the Church today. Of course women would be perfectly capable (there are plenty of accounts of it in church history), but for reasons unknown to us children, that responsibility has been solely entrusted to the men right now. Kate Kelly may be in "time-out", but her Heavenly parents don't love her any less. And despite any immature judgments from her more "obedient" siblings, the family misses her and wants her to come back to join them.
Is it a terrible thing to question parental decisions? Of course not! Questions can be such wonderful opportunities for children to learn. It's always better to ask a parent directly, rather than a sibling. If a child comes to his parents with his concerns, sincerely wanting to understand (and not just to argue), the parents may deem it appropriate to explain their reasoning to the child in simple terms he can comprehend. Sometimes parents may even conclude the private discussion with an admonition to keep what he had learned to himself, and not run off telling his siblings.
Our Heavenly Parents are so loving, forgiving, patient, and consistent. Their methods and programs may change as the family grows and as more children come to join "family night", but their love and goals for their children never change. Some will choose to whine and pout about what's not fair even to the point of refusing to enjoy the rest of the activities completely. A good father still loves them, but cannot force them to have fun and participate, so he gives them their space and waits for them to decide to come back. (If you've ever dealt with a tantruming two-year-old, you'll know what I'm talking about.)
As a parent myself, I now understand so much better God's dealings with His children. I'm beginning to understand just how much we really don't understand - how shortsighted, forgetful and simple-minded we are compared to Him and His perspective of eternity. Things really do work out best if we trust our Heavenly Parents in obedience, and treat our siblings with love and kindness. I see so clearly how any backbiting, judging, tattling, demeaning or shaming never comes from Heavenly Father. It’s always a sibling. Sometimes they feel justified in treating others this way because they’re enforcing Mom and Dad’s rules, but it’s still wrong. Our Father will always use methods of gentleness and love.
Maybe some children feel like they're not a part of this analogy. They're not even inside that house of love. Maybe they've wandered to a place so far, they can't comprehend deserving to come back to something so lovely. I can say with surety that through Jesus Christ, our older brother, we can be made clean no matter what we've done or how far we've strayed. There is no muddy place too deep, too far, or too dirty for Him to come and help you out. He has descended below all things. All you have to do is call His name and your personal Redeemer will be there by your side to make that journey home with you. I know this is true, more than I can ever describe.
We can come home for family night whenever we give up our childish and selfish desires, and trust our Father in Heaven. Because, unlike mortal parents, our Heavenly Parents love us and know us perfectly. They always want all of their children near them and happy. But, just like any good parents, they leave it up to us. It’s always our decision.
Here's a loooong overdue update on the Hasler kiddos.
Paul
Paul quit his all-day thumb-sucking addiction cold turkey, all on his own, in October 2014. (Hallelujah!) Around that same time, we started doing Joy School twice a week with the Nilsens (which he's been loving!). And we started doing daily reading lessons with him from this awesome book my mom recommended:
Paul has learned to READ! He's not even four years old yet and he can read books like Dr. Seuss and Mouse and Mole! (I may have a little mommy pride going on.) Need proof? I was finally able to sneak a video of him reading a library book he'd only seen once before this video was taken.
He also loves working on basic math. Although, that's a little slower in coming. He must take after his mom. ;)
Another thing Paul struggles with is controlling his temper. If you need proof of THAT just come look at his "holy" bedroom door; it looks like someone's taken an ax to it! I never imagined motherhood could be so emotionally draining and morally taxing. There's a huge, intelligent, and very strong willed spirit in that little body. I love him like crazy, but I've got to direct that energy in the right direction somehow! Here are a couple of recent "Paulisms": While holding a ruler next to Darla Paul announces, " she weighs sixty-nine eighty percent". Paul: "Do you know how to get to heaven?" Blair: "How?"
Paul: "I know the way. You just go straight up like a helicopter!"
"Storms are cool to watch! But not the kind that break your house."
Darla
Darla has been a gem of a baby. She's almost six months and just learned how to sit up on her own. She can say "dada" and other similar babbles. She also tried eating sweet potato just a few days ago which was somewhat successful.
We are all obsessed with her adorable smiles and laughs!
Just one more. She loves her big brother!
Blair and I are beyond blessed with these beautiful children!
